Seeking Advice and Real Experiences
Hello everyone! I sincerely want to hear advice and real experiences from Filipino women who are married to U.S. citizens, or who are currently living in the U.S.
I'm engaged to a U.S. citizen, and we plan to get married in the Philippines before moving to the U.S. We already have one daughter, and my fiancé wants to have more children in the future.
I agree to sign a prenuptial agreement (prenup). I respect his right to protect what he has earned through hard work. He gives me about $150 a month as personal spending money, and I'm grateful for that too. To be clear, I'm not asking for his house, car, business, investments, income, or any of his other personal property. I'm not trying to take anything from him.
However, I currently have no personal income and no independent savings. My fiancé wants me to be a stay-at-home mom after we move to the U.S., focusing on raising our daughter and the children we'll have in the future.
After reading the prenup he wrote himself and posted, I became worried about my long-term financial security. The agreement states that his income, business, investments, retirement accounts, and other assets, including any growth during the marriage, are his separate property. It also includes a clause waiving both temporary and permanent spousal maintenance.
He earned what he has through hard work, and I respect that. But I believe raising children, caring for the home, and putting my own career opportunities on hold are also major contributions to a marriage, even if they come without a paycheck.
I have no plans to leave my husband, and I don't expect the marriage to fall apart. I want a lasting marriage with him, to raise our daughter, and to grow our family together. I want to be fully committed to the marriage and give our children a stable, loving home.
My concern is that I don't want to spend years financially dependent, with no personal savings and no reasonable financial security. I want an agreement that recognizes the responsibilities and sacrifices of a stay-at-home mom while respecting both people's rights and property.
I believe a prenup should protect both people, not only recognize the financial contributions of the person earning the income. A stay-at-home mom may not receive a salary, but her time, effort, dedication, and sacrifice have real value in building a family.
I'm posting this because I want to do my research before the wedding, make an informed decision, and understand how important it is to protect both people. I sincerely welcome respectful advice and opinions from anyone who has been through a similar situation.
Thank you for reading.